IF ONLY

She unzipped her jacket

to reveal a baby bump

under her red knit sweater

Her stomach, typically tiny and flat,

caught my eye with its new girth,

the protuberance indicating there was someone

in her life--someone she gave herself to

Odd--

I wanted to touch her belly,

feel the nascent life within, share

the happiness mirrored on her face

Maybe pretend that new life

was my creation, and not the result

of a passionate liaison with some other man

I wanted the bump to be part of me

I wanted to be part of her

I wanted her hand to squeeze mine

at the moment of birth

Truth is, she has another life,

another love, and when she holds

the baby in her arms, she will gaze lovingly,

and see no part of me